Wow. Until now I cannot believe that I am writing this post. 2 weeks had passed since she passed away and everything is still so unreal. It's my first day back from work. And no, not from my maternity leave but from my bereavement leave. Yes, my precious baby that I have given birth to last December 25 is now with the good Lord. I don't want to get into details but every single thing that happened that day will be forever etched on my mind. I still want to continue this blog, same way that we want to continue living for our panganay Lila. Right now, I can't even imagine how it's going to be from now on. Everyday I still look for her smell, her face whenever she wakes up, the cute sound she makes when she's being fed. I crave for even the simplest moments with her. I've lost a mother, but the pain of losing a child is indescribable. I'm sorry I can't put into words what exactly I'm feeling right now. I am both trying to be really strong for my family but during my unguarded moments, I am hit with the realization that I will never be able to hold her again and the feeling is staggering.
|"I will love you forever baby, you will always be my yiyi"|